Adult Estrangement

Estrangement of adult children and a parent or of adult siblings can result in 'ambiguous grief' or 'living grief'. When a loved one dies there is a process of grieving that society recognises and supports and eventually, the grief becomes an integrated part of life without the physical existence of the loved one in it. But when someone chooses to have their life without you in it, this brings never-ending painful, uncertainty.

Often, with estranagement, it feels like there is an expectation from yourself or others that you should be 'getting over it' at some point

Estrangement is 'disenfranchised grief' it is not recognised by society as the deep and real source of pain that is. It often carries a sense of shame and judgement so is difficult to talk about and while sense of hope can be a source of positivity, it can also lead to remaining stuck in a place of frozen disharmony.

While there are no miracle cures and the pain cannot be distinguished wholly and forever, it can be diminished as we learn to grow and live life alongside it.

It is realistic to hope that life can still be meaningful and positive and joyful.